A Mini Revival

 I'm back again. All the stories I've been hoarding, editing, restarting…I want to be free of them. Every scenario, every bit of dialogue, every scrap of colorful language that I collect goes somewhere into the plots I've already started. Whether the idea fits or not, I feel like I can't waste time creating new characters; I owe it to myself to finish something that I've started. Sometimes this means I end up re-reading my own work for an hour, scanning it for where I can slot in that thought I had. Mostly I end up cringing at the words I typed years ago, asking myself if anyone is really gonna like this shit.

So. I released The Worst Days as a complete collection on Smashwords. The second chapter of Power Plays, which I retitled Stay Away from Her, the short piece "Olive Juice," the last official chapter of Watching Him Back all went on Literotica within the past week. The little feedback I've received has been mixed, which matches how I feel about this process. However, in the spirit of purging my brain of these stories, even a low rating means that someone took the time to read my bullshit. That ain't nothing.

What all have I been hoarding, you* ask?

1) Power Plays, aka Stay Away from Her, gets into some bizarre territory. When I was outlining the story (it's too fuckin' long, you guys. Word count currently over 34k) I made a list of the "power plays" that each character made and why. Jesse is fun to write because he's kinda dumb, and since the reader is trapped in his head it's my challenge to make him make any sense as a person while making it obvious why everybody thinks he's an idiot. Todd has the clearest character development, but he's about to make some very bad choices. To Chrisette: I'm truly sorry for what I'm about to do to your character. Most of the major plot developments have been written by now, but I've really built myself a literary obstacle course of how to get between plot points. How far into the relationship are Jesse and Chrisette when Todd moves in? How old is the baby, again? It's the only story I've ever written that required a timeline.

2) There's a folder on my computer called "The Commencement Series" with seven files inside; the anthology I mentioned in the story "Will." Now that "Olive Juice" has joined "Shouldn't" on Literotica I hope it's easier to find a conclusion for Declan and Will. Am I gonna get trashed if they never make it past third base? Probably, but I genuinely can't decide who would top, and I already have two other stories with major prom night sex scenes. Heather's friend Kenzie is a side character in the story of her older brother, told by the only character who isn't involved at the school. This story has been tough because I posed a question to myself that I can't answer. What if The Graduate was gay, but Mrs. Robinson was your boss and Elaine wasn't as forgiving? I wrote the fucked up parts already, but…why would the employee and the boss's son end up together? I don't fucking know.

 "Prom Night" is not the first time I've written porn for the straights—I had a whole fake account with a well-liked werewolf story—but I don't see it playing well if I release under the Acerbicscribbler account. Josh and Heather will likely hang out, bothering me, for a little bit longer until the series becomes an ebook. Maybe I'll do the full version here.

(As an aside, trying to write good straight porn means either asking my female friends very invasive questions or reading a lot of erotica by and for women. I want my friends to still be my friends, so when I was writing le porno hetero I spent hours and hours combing through books and Literotica and literally taking notes. *Ladies, I still don't really understand what squirting is, or if it's fun for you. Feel free to drop some resources in the comments, I guess.)

3) The neighbor of Strange Bedfellows gets a name in the last chapter and meets Andy's parents. And then…what? I'm stuck on how to up the ante on their sex life as the couple becomes more domestic. Or perhaps the 5th chapter is a good enough button and I need to leave it alone.

4) The trouble with Cooper and Marshall of You're Lucky I'm Drunk is where to stop. Right now I have two more parts: the next chapter from Cooper's perspective when Marshall visits him in return, and then Marshall learning how to feel all his feelings immediately after. I keep writing long dialogues between them about their experiences and feelings, and then deleting them. There's so much that Marshall and Cooper could say to each other, but *y'all aren't coming to me because you enjoy frank conversations about fluid sexuality and coming out later in life. *You're here for the sex, goddammit!

5) Sons of the Underbelly has a happy ending in theory. I've been procrastinating on that one because releasing it involves going back to check for verb tenses, and ugh blech blech blech. That's another one that get light on sex as the relationship develops, so the question is how far do we follow Mario and Alex?

6) Dreams of a Doormat has a part 2 that needs fleshing out, and the whole thing needs a good edit. I wrote that while I was living in Japan, and some stuff that was part of my lived experience looks…ahem…insensitive these years later.

7) Although the high school portion of Watching Him Back is over with, there's an epilogue and spinoff I've been kicking around for years that it's time to release. Here first, most likely, and then a polished version to Smashwords.

And that's just the stuff that I can think of off the top of my mind grapes. I recently saw another author on these sites advertise their ebook links (Amazon, specifically, which doesn't carry my stuff) as a way of supporting their work even though they were releasing the free version on GayDemon or whatever. One of my early ebooks, priced at $0.99, got a bad review specifically mentioning that they read it at no cost elsewhere. I was scared away from publishing much after that, but in this gig economy and under this administration? Sure. Read it for free on a site, then throw me the 40% commission off a $1.99 ebook purchase. The fourteen dollars I make per year from writing is a real motivator.

So that's what's up. Hello again.

*Nobody. Nobody still reads this.