Saturday, October 27, 2012


I realize that this scenario is completely nonsensical, but the idea popped into my head one day and didn't leave. Enjoy.

"I'm gonna throw up," I moaned, rubbing my temples.

David set a cup of coffee in front of me. "Yet another night of debauchery?"
I nodded and pull the mug close. Sweet life-giving brew. "I had to take a fucking bus downtown to get my car. Again. And my shirt smells like sandalwood."

"Ah, so the mystery masseuse is back," David joked. "Got oil on your dick?"

"No, dumbass. And I told you that I don't remember anything." These blackout nights didn't happen every weekend; more like a monthly occurrence. It wouldn't be weird given how much and often I drank, but I always woke up at home, showered and in my pajamas, and I always smelled of incense. I didn't burn incense and I never wore pajamas any other day of the year. Weirder and better still, I woke up feeling like my balls had been completely drained. It was as though I'd had amazing sex in my sleep.

"Maybe if you quit getting stoned every time you drink you'd start recalling shit. Like a massage hooker." David tapped my desk. "I need that concert review today, junior."

"You're a fucking idiot. And I only had the one joint. I think." Staring at the screen was going to make this hangover worse. Thinking about the previous night could make me hurl.

"G'morning Gary," David addressed an approaching figure. "Nicky here is attempting to reconstruct the events of last night to prove that he does get laid on the occasion."

Gary, ever the awkward soul, blushed to nearly the color of his hair.

"Don't believe him, Gary. I got pussy aplenty last night. I can feel it in my bones," I declared between sips of coffee. Gary looked tired. "Did you go out?"

He paused. "You don't remember seeing me?"

"Nope, sorry."

"Oh, um..." Gary scratched his head. "I guess you were pretty wasted."

"Don't remember a thing past the beginning of the after party."

"Oh, uh, of course. Right."

David and I watched as Gary turned tail and scurried off to his IT annex. So weird.

"You know," David commented, "I think you make him nervous."

"No, your ugly face makes him nervous," I grumbled.

David kicked my chair before settling at his desk. "I'm serious, bro. He doesn't act like that around me. He's all chatty until you walk in the room, and then he clams up like a dry twat."

I don’t think I care."You have such a way with words, SeƱor Editor."

"Maybe you were an ass to him," David suggested.

I groaned and scrubbed my hands over my face. "Dave, when would I even have the opportunity? I'm never around the guy. Gary's just kind of squirrel-y."

"Apparently you saw him last night."

Directing a glare at my supervisor, I pointed my coffee mug at him. "Lay off me, douchebag. I don't need to be his friend."

"When you say shit like that,” David said calmly, “you sound like a fucking asshole."

"Fine, mother, I’ll talk to him! Fuck!" Why did it even matter? I had a hangover, blank spots in my memory, and an article to write. David was a good supervisor and better friend, but he was nosy as hell.

David shook his head. "Geeze, touchy."

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Saturday Morning Ch. 2

For chapter one click here.

Just my luck that I recall all of the previous night. Everything from making an ass of myself at Claude’s Burgers, to drunkenly clinging to Adam as he drove me home, to telling him how attractive I thought he was, to how eagerly he ripped off my clothes once I invited him to stay. Stop thinking about him, I order my brain. We had a lot of sex. We ended up in the bed, but that certainly wasn’t where we started.

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Bunny Ch. 8

If you haven't read part 7, do so here. Or you can start from the beginning.

Sundays are usually the days when I only get out of Mr. Hale’s bed to bring him food or fetch a toy. I am especially well-behaved now that I leave him to play Ultimate, and though he has said nothing thus far, I know it irks him to lose even an hour of titillation.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

It Began In Darkness Pt. 3

Is this fantasy or some sort of erotic action horror? No idea, because there's still no plot. Read part 2 here.
Mikhail whirled back around to face his boss. “What?”

Cillian whistled, though to Mikhail’s ears it sounded mocking.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Bunny Ch. 7

If you haven't read part 6, do so here. Or you can start from the beginning.

The whole week before the final game of the Ultimate Frisbee season my stomach is in knots. Mr. Hale keeps showing up a little before it’s time for me to leave practice, though he hasn’t yet stepped out of the car, and I’ve taken to sitting in a booth at the coffee shop so that he is be unable to see Brandon lounging across from me. Mr. Hale, for all his faults, is an extremely intelligent man. It would not surprise me at all to discover that he has been aware of my attraction to Brandon the whole time.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Bunny Ch. 6

If you haven't read part 5, do so here. Or you can start from the beginning.
One of cold weather’s benefits is that I am no longer required to sit in the park while I read. Mr. Hale tried to make the argument that the Ultimate team plays in frigid temperatures, I reminded him, giggling, that we are running and keeping our bodies warm, and that I am physically incapable of simultaneously jogging and reading.

The first time that I am supposed to be reading in the coffee shop, I spend most of my time staring at Brandon as he cheerfully hands out steaming cups of caffeine-laced sugar to the disgruntled masses. I catch his eye occasionally and he grins at me as though we are sharing a private joke. I don’t absorb very much of my reading; I’m far too consumed by trying to control my blush reflex.

I decide that the next day I am simply going to read and not face the counter. Brandon, however, innocently ruins my plans when he asks, “Hey, I haven’t taken my break yet, and I don’t want to interrupt your reading time, but is it okay if I sit with you for, like, ten minutes later?”

The Roommate Ch. 3

Read chapter 2 here.

Julius rolled his eyes irritably and got off the couch, but dumbstruck Preston morphed back into angry Preston.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” he yelled, his face flushing. “Two days?”

“Two days,” I said calmly, and grabbed my keys as I walked out the door.