Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 16

 This is it. We did it. This is the end of where we follow Jay and Dillon (at least until I figure out if I want to follow through on some vague ideas of a high school reunion for him, Aaron, and Crispin. Don't encourage me). This feels a little disjointed to my eyes, but it's also a literal first draft, so…if it sucks shit then let me know, I guess. Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 15

 He pulls back a little. "You can't stay the whole night," Dillon protests. It's not even twelve o’clock.

"Gimme an hour," I insist. "I’ll have you in bed by two." I’ll fucking have him in bed in ten.

Dillon looks unsure, so I put both hands on his face and smush. "Or just tell me what big-ass secret you've been keeping."

He steps back and pulled his phone from his pocket, texting quickly. I’m already starting to breathe a little heavy. Like, this wasn’t the plan, not at all, but fuck me if I don’t take this opportunity, right? If Dillon’s willing…Holy shit. Are we seriously going to fuck again? Like for real? Holy fucking shit. I’m so excited.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 14

Until this story is finished, I want you to imagine me as the meme of Elmo in front of flames. Typing at any opportunity, stuck in a hell of my own making, no longer caring about quality. We're getting this done.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 12

It’s almost the end of the month when I give in and find fucking Crispin Viera in the student union.

“I need to ask you something real quick.”

He folds his arms, cocks his hip out all queeny. “I’m not going with you to a second location.”

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 11

Y'all know I'm not having fun unless I'm torturing some characters a little bit.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 10

The holidays are so goddam packed and yet I'm so goddam close to getting rid of this story from my overloaded brain. So I'm going to be posting more here. LFG.

Nothing in the world can get me to stop thinking about it. Sex with Dillon. I fucked him. He liked it. He said it was good. Not ten out of ten, but at least edging up on an eight. I fucked him. Dillon showed me how to fuck him, and I did it. We had sex.

I don't know what to do with this information.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 8

"How are you feeling?" Dillon asks once we're strapped in his car. It's a Jeep. His tall car was a Jeep the whole time. I never would have pictured him in a Jeep. Is Dillon more outdoorsy than his style would have him appear? Jesus.

"Better," I answer honestly. "I mean, I still feel loopy, but better. My head hurts."

"Good," he says.

I watch him drive in silence. This feels like we're back to normal. Normal was short for our weird little buddy-ship, but I enjoyed it while it was there. I am glad that Dillon didn't give up on me. It sucks that I had to get a concussion to figure that out, but maybe, "I got mad because I thought you had just been messing with me this whole time, like your deal was turning straight guys and laughing about it." The words just come out. This is worse than when we were drunk and he called me a dumb shit, because we were at least on the same level of functionality or whatever. Now I can't think straight, and Dillon's all level-headed and chill.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 7

 I got a harebrained idea that I'm going to get two stories finished and out into the world before the end of the year. This one is flowing a little more naturally at the moment (and your feedback helps a lot, Cameron). Retrospectively, it's funny that I thought it would be a quick, flashy installment. The current draft is pushing 24,000 words.

There will be some continuity errors if you hold the Watching Him Back epilogue I posted as canon, but…we sally forth knowing that nobody will care all that much.

“Are you kidding me?” I ask Professor Valero, and he actually chuckles. “I’m passing? For real?”

He leans back against his desk. “Not only that, but I just finished grading the last test. You earned yourself a B.”

I must be grinning like an idiot. “Seriously?”

“Indeed.”

This is the first time I’ve ever left a meeting with a teacher feeling good about myself. I never had to worry about it before because I’m a fucking great cornerback when my ACL isn’t fucked. Okay, also it was easier to cheat in high school. Here, people get really mad if you fuck off during a group project. But, like, it’s feels fucking amazing to have tried and gotten a real result. I got a B on a Stat test! I gotta celebrate.

Who can I tell first?

Jay's Not Gay You Guys 6

“I am too fucking dumb for this,” I groan.

Dillon puts his pen down. “Have you ever been tested for ADHD?”

“Nah, my mom wouldn’t let me because she said that Ritalin makes you bipolar.”

Dillon is silent.

“Yeah, she has some theories,” I explain sheepishly. “Everything I learn in college makes it harder to go home. And my mom isn’t dumb! It’s just…whatever.”

Ugh, Dillon looks so goddam sympathetic. “I don’t really think you’re stupid, Jay. I think nobody taught you how to learn in a system that isn’t built for you. Wait, why are you standing up?”

I hadn’t realized I was out of my seat. I sit. “What?”

“No, I was just saying that you probably learn differently.”

“Like a disability?”

Jay's Not Gay You Guys 5

I manage to not bring it up when Dillon finally sets up a tutoring session. Well, kind of. He said I wasn’t his bro, which feels bad. The same chatbot that suggested I apologize with specifics also said I should ask Dillon follow up questions about shit he’s already brought up. It steered me right the last time, so after a full hour of being a loyal study dog I try out one of the friendship-building tactics.

“You and Viera are still friends, huh? Is that weird in the, you know, queer community here?”

Dillon looks at me like I grew a second head. “Cris is the only other one who didn’t know. And was also getting cheated on.”

“Yeah, you said. No, I just mean, like…who do you, like, date? If you’re mad at everyone.” I’m showing compassion and an interest in his life. Good job, me.

Jay's Not Gay You Guys 4

I did a word count check on this Watching Him Back epilogue, and it's long. Long in a way that makes me question whether it's worth it. I get to write about another dumbass, though, so at least I'm having fun. Right guys? Right?

Right?

Here's more of this:

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 3

Part one got flagged for some reason, and I haven't figured out how to contest it. Let me know if I need to repost it or something. Ya'll, I really thought I was cooking back when I started this shit. Now I'm not so sure; maybe it's because I'm farther away from my own college experience than when I wrote the bulk of this epilogue. Whatever. Here's some more of it, and hopefully it resembles a story with plot and characters.

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 2

"Are you going the foam party on Friday?" I ask casually in lab.

Dillon shakes his head, and then sighs. "Yeah, actually." I knew this, but it makes it way easier knowing that he doesn't want to go. We work in silence for a little bit, until he does what I want and asks, "You?"

"Naw, man," I say. "My friend Carter's pledging Sig Ep, and they're all having a Fortnite tournament. It’s supposed to be a fundraiser."

Dillon seems to perk up at that, but he doesn't say anything.

"You wanna come?" I can feel him analyzing me, but my face is all up in the microscope. "Okay, I found the water flea."

Dillon passes me a dropper of alcohol and replies, "I could make it."

Jay's Not Gay, You Guys 1

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Back To It

Went on a work trip, then vacation, then had surgery, and now it's typing time. One more episode of Mob Men and then I'm on to the next bit o' nonsense. I'm itching to get some of the shorter works finished and thus the options are:

1. Dreams of a Doormat (what a fuckin' title. Ugh to younger me. Ugh.)
2. Last chapter of the My Neighbor series, which will need a new title because that's the title of every other goddam story. And I think I already said the new collection would be Strange Bedfellows, which isn't great, either—that's gotta be top 10 in the list of I-Write-Porn-But-Look-I'm-Smart titles. I already made a bad ebook cover, though, so what's done is done.
3. The long, single-chapter sequel to Watching Him Back in which Aaron and Crispin are secondary characters.
4. Finally finishing You're Lucky I'm Drunk. This one's tough because I actually like these characters. Neither of them are assholes or dummies, which makes it hard to let the story be a short one.
5. Finishing Will…and letting myself get hammered in the ratings because the main characters never have full-on penetrative sex.

In the meantime, back to posting the bits and bobs of nonsense.

Watching Him Back 4.6

I remembered my login.

The couch is just large enough that I can straddle my boyfriend’s lap. Crispin’s hands wander over my skin as I kiss his mouth, pull me closer when I grind against him. Our skin burns where it touches. I’m on fire, I’m so hard it hurts. Crispin’s cock curves up against the cleft of my ass. It’s still scary, but that portion of my brain shouting, This will really hurt! gets smaller and more garbled with every taste of Crispin’s tongue.

With lips still pressed to mine Crispin fumbles for the lube. “You ready?”

“I’m still ready,” I respond, lying less this time.

"Then take off your underwear."

"You take it off," I respond. It's kind of fun to be a brat.

Read the rest at https://reamstories.com/acerbicscribbler

Watching Him Back 4.5

The first part of chapter 4 is here and 4.4 is here.

Crispin and I don’t get to hang out much in the week before prom. There’s some brief fondling in the art classrooms after school, but all his girlfriends want him to shop with them and plan for fucking after parties, and I’m busy trying to figure out how I’m going to take a cock up my ass for the first time in my life.

I wonder if Crispin did all the same kind of research before he came over that first time. All the sanitary and safety issues—I have a new respect for the porn stars who manage to do this all day without prolapsed anuses right and left. What did he had time to do in the bathroom, then, when he jumped up and was all, "Gotta go get ready!" I wonder?

My getting ready might have been different from his, but I think I've psyched myself up enough that I'm at least prepared for when Crispin walks in at 11:30 on prom night. I greet him with a wolf whistle.

"Da-yum, Viera," I say appreciatively, and motion for him to turn around. He obliges. "I like that ass in them pants."

Crispin smiles shyly. He really does look like a pint-size GQ model with his velvet tuxedo jacket, slim-fitting pants, and his hair somehow pinned up so that it doesn’t seem long enough to reach his back. I guess I won’t be pulling on it tonight.

“People are dumb,” I say without really thinking.

Read the rest at https://reamstories.com/acerbicscribbler

Watching Him Back 4.4

The first part of chapter 4 is here and 4.3 is here.

“Hey, Mom,” I say casually as I’m unloading the dishwasher, “I think Crispin’s gonna come over after prom to hang out.”

Mom looks up from the recipe book she has out on the kitchen island. "Aaron, honey, I really think you should spend more time with your friends." She speaks slowly, like she’s trying to find the right words.

"Crispin is my friend, Mom."

"I know, sweetheart, but I haven't seen Carter or LeAndre or Jay around in a long time, and with some of the trouble you’ve had at school," she replies, "the mother in me can't help but be worried."

Read the rest at https://reamstories.com/acerbicscribbler

Watching Him Back 4.3

Brought to you by Saturday's winner, Luz.

For the second time in one day I have Crispin's hard cock in my hand. Crispin's breath mingles with mine, blowing hot over my neck. His hand is wrapped tightly around my dick, moving in time with my hand on his.

I felt like a fucking rock star when I saw him waiting by my car. He looked so self-conscious, glancing nervously at every person who walked by. All I said to him was, “Hey,” and unlocked the car, and then Crispin chewed his lip and shrank in his seat until we reached my neighborhood. Given how he jumped when I reached for his hand as soon as the car was in drive, I think he was as worried for me and my reputation as what people would think of him. Maybe that’s a weird trigger, but it turned me the fuck on.

Now it’s easier to make him come. There’s lube, there’s mood music, we’re on a couch instead of a bathroom stall, and that half hour of dry humping and making out wound him up. With his usual silence Crispin shudders and spills onto my fist, and I’m not far behind.

Today has turned out to be a very good day.

Read the rest at https://reamstories.com/acerbicscribbler

Watching Him Back 4.2

The first part of the fourth installment is here.

“Crispin.” There’s a tiny person to my right, tugging on him. “Let’s go.” The boy gives the last word two syllables.

Crispin and I untangle ourselves swiftly and I wipe my face.

“Sorry, this is my little brother. Quentin,” he crouches to look the boy in the eye, “say hello to my friend Aaron.”

Quentin and I shake hands. “Were you crying?” he asks suspiciously.

Read the rest at https://reamstories.com/acerbicscribbler